Let's Keep It Simple

Something I've really been mulling over for the past week is how to convey to people what I believe--but at the same time, keep it amazingly simple. Generally speaking, Christians have an enormous fear of sharing their faith with non-believers. Honestly, I haven't ever seen it as my mission to go "Jesus-jam" others with a fanatic belief system that will have them falling on their knees and repenting within seconds of talking to me. The way I want others to come to Jesus is by seeing my life--the way I live it--and then finding themselves wanting what I have.
I recently found myself in a group setting with believers as well as non-believers. The topic was gaining our spiritual athority, but it somehow got off on a rabbit trail about the ten commandments, following all of the laws and stipulations, using the Bible as a filter for our lives, casting out demons, etc. For any non-believer (and some believers!) that can be completely overwhelming. I found myself literally hurting for those who were left so far behind--some were still hovering in the beginning of the whole conversation. After all, it felt like the Bible was being presented as a big book of "no-nos, don't dos, stay away froms, and thou shalt nots." Not a good way to shine His light in the dark if you ask me.
How is it that we are supposed to want others to live a glorified, spirit-filled, wonderful life when all they see or hear is a bunch of religious, law-following nonsense?
Here is how I feel about it in a nutshell: I believe in the one true God--that there are 3 parts to him--Father, Son, Holy Spirit. If I choose to allow the Holy Spirit to speak to me and through me, then I have no choice but to follow the ten commandments. It's not about living under condemnation or the law (Jesus came to fullfill the law, thus allowing grace to take over), it's about doing what God asks of me. It's not about a formula for success with tithing or giving. It's about listening to what He has to say and directing the money He gives me to the places where it can be used the most--by Him. It isn't about being a Bible beater--one that sits on a street corner and screams to the public that they are all going to hell if they don't repent right now. It's about forming relationships and showing the love of the Father at all times, even when it isn't easy. I want to lift up a voice (or in my case an instrument as well) of praise to Him who supplies all of my needs AND wants. It's about trusting that He has a better plan for my life than I do, even when things aren't going the best.
I don't think it can be any simpler than that. Of course, as you become a more mature Christian, you will figure things out and be able to take territories, cast out demons, etc. That is revealed with time, understanding, and knowledge. Yes, I believe that those are great benefits to being His child, but that isn't for everyone to grasp--especially when what they are seeking is answers and love. Basically what I'm saying is that I'm tired of non-believers running from Christians because of the massive amount of crap we put on them and not only expect them to believe, but to swallow at once. Can't we just keep it simple?

Of all things, I want to share this with those who want to know what the best way to live is:

"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Matthew 22:36-40

War Of The Worlds

When I was younger (late teens, early twenties) I feared war movies. I hated anything bloody and yucky. Of course, those were the movies that my darling husband wanted to watch. I remember being 6 months pregnant with my oldest child, Caitlin, and sitting in the movie theatre, hands over eyes, attempting to watch Saving Private Ryan. Needless to say, it was a huge no-go. I ended up in the bathroom with a sick stomach and blinding headache.
Amazingly over time, I have grown--dare I say comfortable?--with war movies in general. I even let the hubby rent one from time to time and I will watch it with him. I can't say that I thuroughly enjoy them as he does, but I do find myself interested in the plots.
The one main thing that I have dealt with as it relates to war movies is fear. I found myself playing the role of the soldier's widow. My mind races at an amazing pace as I live this "other" life where John is a soldier, we are back in Vietnam War times, I am bawling at the loss of my husband, and I am left alone with 5 small children. Or, we are in present times and it's more like an "end of the world" war where he and I are both killed. Morbid, yes. Honestly, I think that's why I have had this unhealthy fear of war movies. I actually believe it goes deeper than the surface with this matter.
While listening to Don Paul's Building The Warrior Series (www.prophet.tv) on my i-pod during my workout yesterday, I grabbed ahold of something he said. Basically, he was talking about how to fight in the spiritual realm and break through on things like finances. That in itself was an interesting lesson, but I got more out of it than that. He made a comment that dealt with death. He said (paraphrasing here)---until we show the devil that we are not worried about losing our lives, he will continue to pelt us with fear and much more. Once we let him know we no longer fear that, he will flee and be terrified. For some reason, that just hit home and made so much sense to me. I realized I have had this unhealthy fear of losing my life--or even of John losing his life--that it has caused me great worry and frustration. Somehow, watching war movies heightened that and brought it to the front of my mind. The devil knew exactly what it would take to make me fret over this for days--even weeks--after watching a war movie, and he used it to his advantage every time.
This brings me to last night. We rented We Were Soldiers and watched it. I can honestly say that for the first time in my history of existence, I was not afraid. My mind did try to wander off and play the role of the grieving widow, but I stopped it dead in its tracks.

I can hear the devil shreeking in fear as I type this.

Anywho, it reminded me that I can take this way further than just the times I watch war movies. I am in a war right now--not a physical one, but a spiritual one. Now that the devil knows that I don't fear losing my physical life, he is definitely in trouble. I am ready to push forward and take more territory in His name.

Take that, devil....take that.

War is no longer something I fear, dread, worry about, or hide from. Oh no. It's something I want to embrace. This war in the spiritual world is exciting and adventurous, and I want to be totally prepared for it. Stay tuned for more on that...

~I Need~

I need:

~others to be patient with me

~extra grace on days when the sun isn't shining the brightest at our house

~friends who not only know me, but care about my feelings and desires

~a lesson on being more loving towards others who are not so lovable

~a kiss from my husband every morning and a hug from each child every night

~a good book to read when the computer and television start taking up too much of my time

~a smile from a stranger--at least once in a while

~a date night

~a small getaway with other women who share in my faith walk

~a chance to use my imagination and not feel stupid for doing so

~not to worry about the future, but embrace it and prepare for it

~hope, faith, knowledge, and understanding

~a hot bath that can last longer than 5 minutes

~a visit from an angel (sometime in my life, I would just love to meet one. come to think of it, I probably already have and didn't know it)

~silence

~to see the true beauty in others and not be envious, but praise God for all of our differences

~a miracle that will knock my socks off and blow me away (don't know what that is yet)

~good food and time with extended family

~laughter and play

~to get down on my knees, put my face to the floor, and come to the realization that I really don't "need" anything but the love of the Father, and to share that love with others

Deep Down

I am experiencing an exhaustion in life at this very moment that is deep down--all the way into my bones. Ok, I think it's actually deeper than that. It's not the fact that I am typing this at 11pm. It has nothing to do with having 2 extra children in our house today and tomorrow. I haven't strained myself at the gym, nor have I gotten any less than 8 hours of sleep a night for about a year now. This is an exhaustion that comes from so deep down that it's truly impossible to pinpoint or even correctly describe to someone who has not experienced it.
As I sit here and draw in a massive deep breath, I try to figure out just when this all started. I flip through the rolodex of my mind and think about this month's events.....last month's......up to 5 months ago. Where did I go wrong? How did I let this exhaustion creep in? I seriously thought I had my guard up this whole time. *looking from side to side for an access point*
Wait a minute. A thought just struck me---what if this is from actually doing something right (heaven forbid)? John and I have been plowing and moving like crazy these past few months. I have had to stay on top of every word, movement, thought, gesture, etc. I have actually had prayer sessions that have rocked my world. The Spirit is moving, flowing, guiding.....
Maybe that's it! This exhaustion is a good thing-a test of sorts.
I remember seeing something as a child that is popping into my mind right now. It was on a cartoon--a man, walking through the desert. He was dressed poorly, head wrapped with what was left of his shirt to keep the heat off and cool in, no shoes, pants torn and made into shorts, unshaven face, leathery skin, parched lips...you get the picture right? He's holding a hand out as he drags his body through the blowing sand..he's yelling,"Waaaater. Waaaaater. Water!"
That is exactly how I feel. I see myself dragging my body through each day with my hand reaching out to Him. I'm thirsty and weak, and it's from fighting so hard just to make each day better than the next. My exhaustion is from the heavy combat, and that's a good thing.
You know, it has definitely taught me something---something I want to remember when He gives me the time of refreshing that I am so thirsty for. I want to crave Him, seek Him, and hold my hand out to Him even when I'm feeling my best. Whether tired or refreshed, I want my Father's Will in my life, not my own.
This ache even beneath my bones is wonderful, and I thank Him for it. Selah

"Let them give thanks to the LORD for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men, for he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things." Psalm 107:8-9

Play On

On the way home this evening, I found my radio station tuned to classical music. As I turned the volume up, a song that I have loved for years flowed through the car.
Ahhhh, the Bach Double (Violin Concerto in D Minor). It was pure bliss as I began to feel my fingers moving with the notes. They ached to play it again, but they will never do so as they did back in the day. Why you might ask? It's very simple, yet very sad.
When performing the Bach Double, you must have a partner. The song is a conglomeration of two violinists with their fingers running the fingerboard in various exciting and dramatic ways. The song sounds terrible unless the two partners are totally in sync. I was in sync with my partner, Renee Hall, when we performed it for the Greater Southwest Music Festival ( was 16, she was 15)--we earned a 1, a high award, for our performance. It took roughly 6 months of painstaking practice and listening. Renee and I spent hours rehearsing in Mrs. Gibbins' studio. Those were the days when I played for fun.
This brings me to why I won't perform the Bach Double again--or at least anytime soon.
On August 4, 2007, Renee (Hall) Ramsey died tragically in a car accident while driving to a vacation spot with her family. She and I shared the same passion for violin music. Even though our styles of playing were very different, we connected on a level that was just right. I feel a heaviness in my chest when I think about her not being on this earth anymore. After all, she was only 25 years old when she died.
Her death is actually the way God brought me out of my "violin depression." I stopped studying under Mrs. Gibbins when I was 17 (right before I got married--and Renee had moved to Nebraska), and I preceeded to stuff my violin in a closet and refuse to pick it up. At that point in my life, I had nothing to play for--no one to listen. That's what I thought anyway.
Upon hearing of her death, I was immediately drawn to the closet where my violin sat. I picked it up and played piece after piece after piece. I think I went through all 7 Suzuki books in one evening. The amazing thing was that after 9 years, it all flowed like I had practiced it yesterday. Roughly 3 months after that, the worship leader of Plum Creek Fellowship (our church now) called and invited me to play on the worship team there. I was amazed to say the least.
God knew what it would take to pull me from my self pity. Not that I'm saying Renee's death was for that very reason, but it was a catalyst. Deep in my soul, I had been longing to play for my Father that whole 9 years that the violin was tucked away. He knew that too. What I didn't realize was that His heart was longing to hear what I had to play. He was my audience, and with Him, all music was possible. I may not ever perform the Bach Double again in this life, but I'm okay with that. After all, the One who gave me the talent to play, the music to perform, and the heart to put it all together is just a whisper away.
I can hear Him saying, "Play on, Melissa .............play on.

"The LORD will save me, and we will sing with stringed instruments all the days of our lives in the temple of the LORD." Isaiah 38:20

Pass The Bar Of Soap

If you have not seen the movie, "A Christmas Story," then you won't know what this picture is about. Allow me to explain: Ralph, the main character, came home from school and uttered a curse word to his mother. He then found himself in the bathroom with a bar of soap in his mouth. Fun stuff I'm sure.
For some reason, I have really struggled with "not so nice" words leaking out lately. I have certainly tried to stay on top of ALL words since having children, but occassionally I find myself saying something I regret. Curse words are such a frustration to me. I know people that can't seem to keep from inserting one in every sentence, and I remember how I used to be just like that. I had a huge potty mouth--I'm sure I would have put some sailors to shame. However, when I decided to change my life and everything about it, I not only made a point to stop using curse words, but I no longer had the desire to do so.
That's the frustration point. I know in my knower that I no longer have the desire to use those words. Then, out of nowhere, I will be in a situaton that gets a bit heated and I let one loose.
Ack!
Next thing I know, I am in a similar situation later on and 2 or 3 curse words come out.
Double ack!
With my focus on so many other things right now, I've apparently let this issue slide. That's not an excuse, only the truth. Here is what I want to focus on for this week--I want to take a much closer look at my words. I have to stay on track and not let any weapon formed against me prosper. It's time to pick up that "spiritual bar of soap" and clean out the potty mouth. I want my children to only hear words of peace, blessing, honor, and love coming out of this mouth. Three verses came to mind while writing this:

1. "With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water." James 3:9-12

2. "Whoever of you loves life and desires to see many good days,
keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies." Psalm 34:12-13

3. "You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD. " Psalm 139:3-4

You know, it really does feel much better to get it all out and admit when I'm wrong. It's hard to even write about issues such as cursing, but in the grand scheme of things, I see it as just another way the devil tries to make me stumble and fall. I'm so very thankful I can run to His Word and find verses that help me deal with this kind of issue. I feel encouraged, uplifted, and best of all---free.

I Think I Can, I Think I Can

There are so many times during the day that I feel like the Little Engine That Could...chugging right along down the track when suddenly I come up to a hill......no.......a mountain! I have to put all of my effort and engine power into climbing that mountain.
One little bitty step at a time.
All the while I have to keep telling myself that I CAN conquer it. I do find myself having to repeat that over and over at times just to keep my momentum going. I can see the peak--I'm almost there.
Today, we show our house for the 7th time (not counting the open house last month). To me, that just doesn't seem like enough lookers. Granted, the market is supposedly super slow right now, but I just don't believe that's the way it has to be for us. Some would say we are foolish for hoping for a quick sale. This is my mountain. I feel like it is taking all of my faith, breath, hope, prayers, etc. to get this house sold. I constantly say we are not in a hurry to sell, but I sure am in a hurry to get into my new house. I haven't, even for a single moment, thought that this wasn't the right choice. We are definitely on the right track. We're making headway, I can tell. The right buyers are just at the top of this mountain--I can faintly see them. Yes, there is a light at the end of this tunnel.
I have to stay firm, continue to push forward, give my little engine a good talking-to about not running out of power, and it will somehow work out. I know it will. I am confident in His Word that it will. I want to make sure I keep my eyes focused on Him. Just a little bit of the mountain left to conquer. I think I can, I think I can....

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 1:2-4

Give It All Up

When I was in my quiet time today, I asked the Father to reveal a story to me out of the Bible that would bring about a greater understanding of His Word and help me fix anything in my own life that wasn't working correctly. He took me to the book of 1 Samuel and to a section of the story of King Saul. If you don't know the whole background of Saul, I encourage you to read 1 Samuel chapters 9-31 (I use New King James Version). I know that sounds like a lot to read, but it really goes into depth about the subject I am addressing today, as well as much more of Saul's life.
During Saul's reign, the Lord came to him and instructed him to attack a city called Amalek and kill all men, women, children, and livestock. He wanted to Saul to spare nothing, for this was His judgement upon this land for the wrongdoings they had done to Israel (Chapter 15). Saul went in and attacked, but took the best of the livestock, the king (Agag), and all that he considered good. He refused to utterly distroy everything, thus disobeying the Lord. The prophet Samuel came to Saul the next day and asked him why he didn't destroy everything as he had been instructed to do. In Saul's mind, he had done nothing wrong. He had gone on the mission that the Lord had sent him on, and he killed the people. From the text, it seems that Saul doesn't see his mistakes and disobedience. He thought that by allowing his people to take the best of the livestock for sacrifices, as well as bringing home King Agag as a prisoner, he had done an honorable thing. Samuel had this to say:
"Has the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices,
As in obeying the voice of the Lord?
Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice,
And to heed than the fat of rams."
1 Samuel 15:22
The Lord was so displeased with Saul that he rejected him from being king from this point on. As you read further, you will see that this is how the stage was set for David to become king. Throughout the rest of the book of 1 Samuel, you see Saul struggling to maintain his position as king, even though the Lord had left him and was now with David.
I was being shown through this story that if I continue to hold anything---anything at all back from my Father, His plans for me will be stunted. If I want to stay in the full blessing, I must give it ALL up. Since Saul was stubborn and refused to completely obey what God had told him to do, he paid dearly. Who knows how great of a king Saul could have been? The difference between he and David was this: David was a man after God's own heart. Whatever God asked of him, he did. He was not perfect and made many mistakes. In the end, he wanted for his life what the Father wanted. Saul, on the other hand, thought that he knew better than God. He thought that by being rebellious and trying to work things out for his own good, he would prosper. Unfortunately, that didn't happen and it went the complete opposite direction.
What I am saying is this: I want to be like David, not Saul. I'm not in the running to be the next king, but I do want God's favor upon my life. I must sit down and be completely honest about everything. I must be willing to go in and destroy all bad things within myself--allow God to "clean house." If I hold just one area of my life back from him (picture a little kid with a toy hidden behind his back that he doesn't want his momma to see), then I am in big trouble. The sad part is that I will have brought about my own distruction by doing so. Giving it all up is a great thing. It's the most freeing thing I can do, and it shows who I put my trust in.

Mad

I just want to get it out there---I was very mad at God today. So mad, in fact, that I yelled, cried, and pitched a very big 3-year-old fit. I know that everyone at some point in their life feels just like doing that. After all, being angry is a natural feeling from time to time.
I guess I was just letting go of weeks of frustration. It boils down to this: I trust God with all of my heart, mind, and soul. I know He has my life in His hands and He won't disappoint me. It's just that He's been silent. I don't know if it's my life that's too loud or what. I just need a volume button so I can crank His signal up a bit.
John and I have several fires going at once right now. I wouldn't call them worries, just big things we are hoping for and believing in. I think it's during these times when we feel so focused on His Will for our lives that we sometimes fall victim to not hearing what He has to say. Maybe it's called being too focused and having tunnel vision.
Please excuse the ramblings. I just can't quite put my finger on why I was so mad. I truly believe that anger is a valid feeling--after all, in the Bible God got angry quite a bit. Since we are made in His image, we are bound to have the same feelings He does. I guess what I'm craving is answers. Answers to questions about finances, houses, relationships, futures....the list can go on and on. I want to think that He and I have such a good relationship that I can hear when He tells me important things. I no longer want to have the worries of a day-to-day existence. I want more. I want Him to give me at least a peek into why I am on this earth--a direction to be heading in. I believe that there IS a bigger purpose for me, and that what I am doing on a daily basis is just part of a more grand scheme.
I got over being mad fairly quickly. I was left feeling peaceful and relaxed, as strange as that sounds. John reassured me that it was okay to be frustrated and mad at God, as long as it didn't last very long. He said that he was sure God heard me and was thankful that I was honest with Him about my feelings. The one point I have been taught about being mad is that I should always resolve the issues quickly and never harbor it. God wants us to be fully honest with Him in all situations, not just when everything is rosy and happy. After ridding my body, mind, and soul of the anger, I must pick up my cross and continue to carry it. Only in that is there relief. He is wonderful, glorious, and faithful no matter what I think and no matter how mad I may get. Selah


"In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold." Ephesians 4:26-27

I'm Not Complaining

I am starting something tomorrow. No more complaining. I know that may be funny sounding, but it's the truth. I'm quite frankly tired of complaining to John, friends, family, the kids, etc. Here are my reasons for stopping the petty complaints:
1. I am a child of the Most High
2. I live in America and am totally free
3. I am 100% healthy
4. I am married to an amazing man of God who makes it possible for me to stay at home with our children everyday and do things at my leisure
5. I have 3 adorable children who are all healthy and happy
6. I live in a wonderful house and drive a nice car
7. My pantry and fridge are full at all times
8. I have money to buy what I need and occasionally what I want
9. There are plenty of clothes in our closets
10. I can sit under the air conditioner when it's hot and the heater when it's cold
11. I can take nice hot soaking baths
12. I have health insurance and dental insurance
13. My family lives close by
14. I have a wonderful church home
15. I have this computer to type on

I'm sure there is much more that I didn't include, but you get the picture. I decided that it's time to put ME aside and get more of HIM in my life. The sooner I can do that, the faster I can begin to give more to others. I became extremely embarrassed tonight when I thought about all of the time I have wasted complaining. What good does it do? None. In fact, it hurts my soul--deep down. I really want to radiate happiness, love, and peace---not look like I am harboring things that would give me a reason to throw a pity party. I challenge you to join me. Try it for 5....10....30....60 days and see what happens. Make a conscious effort to rid your life of complaints and give the Father a chance to work within you. I know I'm looking forward to it.

"Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe..." Philippians 2:14-15

Easy Yet Complicated

“If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love.” John 15:10


When I first read this verse I thought, "Oh wow, that is insanely simple. How could I possibly mess that up? All Jesus is wanting is for me to keep his commands. I then have the promise of staying in his love. Easy!"
Ok, let's be honest. It's NOT that easy. Keeping his commands is a hard thing, and I am sure we all recognize that. I cannot tell you how many times a day I do something wrong and start to wonder just how mad God is at me. Is he really going to forgive me? Does he even care? Of course he does. That is why his mercies are new every morning--he knows for a fact that we are going to screw up on a daily basis. It's just a simple as following Jesus' footsteps. He says he followed his Father's commands, and that is what he is asking of us. As a child, my parents used to say, "Do as I say, not as I do." Have you ever heard that? Well, Jesus wants us to do as he says AND as he does. Setting that example for us makes it easier for us to set that example for others. Today I want to challenge you, as well as myself, to be more in tune with the Holy Spirit. Allow him to direct you in the way you should go. Allow him to tenderly speak to you and reveal God's plans to you. Strive to keep all of God's commands and see how much more fullfilled you feel by the end of the day. It may just be the most complicated easy thing you've done all week. Blessings!

World's Strongest Man

Do you remember a certain love story in the Bible--Samson and Delilah? Ok, not so much a story of love, but of betrayal and death. In my small community Baptist church growing up, I was taught that the main point of this story was that Samson was a fool--and we should never act like he did. I probably would have continued to think that for the rest of my life, had my husband not put a different spin on it. One night as we were laying in bed talking before turning the light off, John made a comment that he believed there was more to Samson's story than what today's church would ever address. You can read his story in the Book of Judges chapters 13-17.

Let me begin by paraphrasing Samson's story for you:
I find the beginning of his story very similar to that of Sarah (Abraham's wife), as well as Mary (Jesus' mother). His mother and father were Israelites that were being held captive in the land of the Philistines, and his mother was barren. An angel of the Lord came to her and told her she would bear a son. Sound familiar? Anway, Samson grew up to be an amazingly strong man. The angel had instructed his mother to never let a razor or any cutting object touch his hair--for that was the source of Samson's strength. Samson went on to kill an amazing amount of Philistine men basically with his bare hands. He was almost superhuman in his strength. Samson's downfall was that he was deceived into thinking the Philistine women were who he needed to marry and be with. His first wife tricked him into telling a secret to her that she soon spread to her people. That situation ended in a tragic way. Not only did she leave Samson and marry his best man from their wedding, she and her father were burned in retaliation to how many Philistine men Samson had killed. He then went on to meet Delilah--another Philistine woman. She nagged him constantly, wanting to know what made him so strong. One night, Samson finally gave in and told her, but only after he had lied to her 3 other times. He was just worn out from her nagging apparently, and didn't really think that she would cut his hair. She did though. The next morning when he awoke, the Philistine men were there to capture him--he couldn't do a thing since the Spirit of the Lord had left him (when his hair was cut). The Philistine men gauged out his eyes and took him captive. He was made into a slave as well. One night at a big get together at the temple (over 3,000 men and women), the men decided to have Samson perform for them. They had him standing between the pillars that were the main base of the temple. Samson asked the young man who was in charge of helping him get around if he would allow Samson to rest against the pillars. Secretly Samson prayed to God to give him his strength back one more time so he could punish them for gauging out his eyes. Samson then reached out, pushed the two central pillars, and said, "Let me die with the Philistines." The building crashed down and killed all who were in it. He killed more people in his death than he had killed in his life.

So now let me get to what I think Samson's story is really about. I don't think that so much should be focused on the relationship between Samson and Delilah. Yes, he was stupid. He should not have told her the truth as to why he was so strong. God had given him that wonderful "talent" in order to someday use it for the good of the Israelites, from what I have read. Samson was, for a short time, a fool. But, I think we should focus more on the end of his life. After hitting rock bottom--losing his strength, having his eyes gauged out, and losing his freedom--he still had a heart for God. He still wanted to do the work of his Father. He laid down his life for his fellow Israelites in that he killed all of the high ranking Philistine men (as well as several thousand more).
What my husband was trying to point out was that what Samson did at the end of his life was later pointed to in the New Testament.
John 15:13 says, "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." NIV
Samson knew he had screwed up. He knew that he had stepped outside the will of the Father and had lost the ability to walk in that revelation. The Spirit of the Lord had left him as well. If I'm guessing he probably felt very empty and alone. How often do we feel like that? When have you given a secret of sorts away to the wrong person and felt like His presence was now missing? I just love that Samson wanted to badly to please God and come back into a true fellowship with him again that he laid down his life for his people.
Now that you've seen this perspective on a great Bible hero, hopefully you will do some research and digging on your own. What else can we learn, not only from this story, but from other Bible heroes' stories?

Does It Work?

There is a segment on our local news station called "Does It Work?" The point of the segment is to test a product that viewers have requested a testing of, and then the news person tells if the product works or not--also giving it a star rating from 1 to 5 stars. I have actually avoided quite a few bad purchases by watching this segment, so I tune in regularly. I always love to see if the newest and greatest gadgets really do work in real life.

Why is that important you ask? It brings me to what is burning in my spirit today.
I have tried to be very diligent in having a quiet time. Usually this occurs while my 3 darlings are doing their daily afternoon restings upstairs. That's the time when the television is turned off, all is silent, and I can hear Him the best. He has really been hammering on one major point with me lately, and that is spiritual authority--believing that if I command a mountain to move, it will. Believing that if I ask something of Him, it will be done (within the realm of His will for my life of course). Please bear with me as I take you through a recent lesson learned in this area.

About 7 months ago, I dug up a talent of mine that has been hidden in the back of the closet for over 9 years. I absolutely love playing the violin and was classically trained from the age of 8 until the age of 17. After pulling out my beloved 4 stringed beauty, I was amazed that I could still recall some of the concertos I used to perform--by memory of course--and would get tickled pink when I would be able to play them with every appropriate forte and pianissimo. My violin is a story of God's handiwork in itself, but I'll save that story for another time. Moving on...
The whole reason I pulled the violin from the closet was because God put a worship team smack dab in the middle of my path. The worship leader of a small local church invited me to play and be a part of that ministry. I was thrilled to put it lightly. Of course I had to dust off the sweet-sounding baby and try her out--make sure she still worked the same and I hadn't faded too much over the years in ability. It was music to my ears--and hopefully to my Father's. After playing on the worship team for several months, I had frustrations. My violin was beautiful and a very worthy-to-be-played instrument, but it wasn't getting picked up as well and the sounds were not as equal as I would have liked. Not that I cared really what the congregation thought, but I wanted to blend more with the group and not stick out like a sore thumb. Unity, ladies and gentlemen--that's what it's all about. The answer, to me, was so easy. I knew that if I had an electric violin, I could just plug right in like the guitars and unity would totally be achieved!
I began to pray: "Father, I would love to have an electric violin. I am going to start looking, and when I find one, I'll let you know."
As I was perusing the internet, I stumbled (purely not by accident I assure you) onto a website that was clearancing out a Hohner mint green electric fiddle. Not the typical color choice of musicians, but it was very cool and affordable! I did the correct amount of checking on the brand and type before making my request known to Him. As I laid in bed one night, I said, "Abba, I found the violin I want. It's $300 and I know we do not have that kind of money right now. Please, Abba. I am asking for the money to pay for this so I can praise you even more with the talent you gave me."
His answer was so very clear--"Melissa, the money is in the mail."
Ok, that's awesome God! Now....what's the timeline on that? No answer. Hmmmm....ok, this is obiviously where patience comes in.
Well, about 2 weeks later, I went to the mailbox and discovered an odd letter from an old dentist we used to go to for our regular cleanings. I opened the letter and in it was a check for $326.xx--we had apparently overpaid him at some point and he was reimbursing us.
AMAZING. STUPIFYING.GLORIOUS.
I did my "praise you Father!" dance and ordered the mint green electric violin that very night.
I have been playing it and doing so with my whole heart every Sunday that I step on that stage. I jokingly refer to it as "God Green" when people ask me about the unusual color. The instrument is a fine one for sure.
Funny how even when He gives us such great things, He offers us a chance to receive even MORE.
This all winds back to what He has been hammering me with. Spiritual authority is what it is all about. God has been kindly and gently teaching me to spread my wings and fly in Him. I have begun to see the miracles and wonders that can happen when you simply speak to the mountain, walk on the water, and meet Him in His courts.
About 10 days ago, I felt the tug of the Holy Spirit about this whole electric violin thing. I have suddenly had the urge to give it away to a young lady who is just beginning her musical journey on the violin. She plays with the youth worship team at our church, and she takes private lessons from the same teacher who I had the privilege of studying under. She borrowed my minty green baby about 3 weeks ago and fell in love with it. I have heard her mention several times that she'd like one. Well now I was on a mission--one from God. I originally sought out to just buy her a new electric violin, not give her mine. I checked on Amazon, Ebay, 3 music sites, and no luck in the price range I was wanting. Then it appeared. Ebay had it. A woman from Maryland listed her used Zeta electric violin for an unbelievable price. I watched it and waited. I told John and my parents about it and how excited I was--that I would be able to get this and give this sweet young lady mine which is newer. I knew all along it would take a miracle to get this. Not that it was hugely expensive, but again--we did not have the money for it. An amazing twist--my dad secretly put a bid in on this Zeta on my behalf. When he finally told me what he had done, I was shocked and slightly embarrassed. I guess feeling that way was because I don't ever expect that kind of gift from my parents. It's just too much. Coming to terms with his generous offer and getting the plan into action, we waited for the end of the Ebay auction. In the final hours of bidding, the price jumped. I actually began to worry a bit. With 2 hours left on the auction, I shut the computer down and hit my knees.
"God, I just thank you that this is my Zeta. I praise you that I can come before your throne and ask things like this of you and you see it as good. I give you ALL of the glory and honor for allowing me to win this auction, and in turn being able to give away the mint green violin that you provided the money for in the first place. I just want to spend the rest of my life harboring a giving spirit. Please, Lord, teach me to give more and more and more! Open the doors and give me the opportunities to bless others. I speak to the auction and say that it will not go any higher--that I will get this Zeta for the price it is listed at now. I praise you Father that I can speak to this auction and it will have to obey."
You know what? For the first time in a long time, I truly believed what I prayed. I took that spiritual authority He has given me and I ran with it.
The wonderful ending to this is that the price did not go any higher. I spoke to the mountain and the mountain moved!
I am the proud owner of a Zeta electric violin.
I am the proud giver of a Hohner mint green electric violin.
I am the proud daughter of a blessed and very generous dad and mom.
I am the proud servant of the Most High.
I am a strong Christian woman with spiritual authority.
So this all circles back to my original comment about "Does It Work?" I can honestly say that I have tried, tested, and come out on the winning side of this one. YES! The God-given spiritual authority within each of us DOES WORK! It's free too...my kind of deal. It will never wear out, doesn't require batteries, works anytime day or night, and it is mighty powerful. I give it 5 out of 5 stars!
Matthew 17:20
He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."

The Number 3

Lately God has had a thing for numbers with me. I do believe He speaks in number riddles sometimes, but I also believe you can't always hold Him to only speaking that way. The number can change anytime, and it can also become a non-issue.
My number has been 3. There are several instances in my life where this number has popped up, and not by coincidence I assure you. Examples:
1. I have 3 children (no plans for more either)
2. John and I were married on the 3rd
3. The house number of the house we are buying has three 3's in it
4. He has given me dreams that contain 3 of something several times
I could go on, but there's more to this post than just that.
About 3 weeks ago (there's the 3 again), John and I were "challenged." Our Father definitely wants to shower blessings on us, and it's our responsibility to do what He asks of us to usher in those blessings. He challenged us to give more of ourselves to Him by doing just that--following His lead and walking in His footsteps. God also gave us a special passage from Ephesians that I want to share with you. I really hope that it not only encourages and inspires you, but shows just how funny God can be at times. Yes, I believe He has a great sense of humor. After all, aren't we patterned after Him? I will break in at times to reveal the 3's as we go along.
PLEASE READ THIS: IT WILL ONLY TAKE A FEW MINUTES AND YOU WILL BE ENCOURAGED!!!

Ephesians 3 (see the 3 again?) The Message Bible

The Mystery Revealed (title of section)
"This is why I, Paul, am in jail for Christ, having taken up the cause of you outsiders, so-called. I take it that you're familiar with the part I was given in God's plan for including everybody. I got the inside story on this from God himself, as I just wrote you in brief.
As you read over what I have written to you, you'll be able to see for yourselves into the mystery of Christ. None of our ancestors understood this. Only in our time has it been made clear by God's Spirit through his holy apostles and prophets of this new order. The mystery is that people who have never heard of God and those who have heard of him all their lives (what I've been calling outsiders and insiders) stand on the same ground before God. They get the same offer, same help, same promises *that's 3 things we get!* in Christ Jesus. The Message is accessible and welcoming to everyone across the board. This is my life work: helping people understand and respond to all the details.

Purpose of the Mystery (title of section)
It came as a sheer gift to me, a real surprise, God handling all the details. When it came to presenting the Message to people who had no background in God's way, I was the least qualified of any of the available Christians. *I know I feel that way a lot!* God saw to it that I was equipped, but you can be sure that it had nothing to do with my natural abilities.
And so here I am, preaching and writing about things that are way over my head, the inexhaustible riches and generosity of Christ. My task is to bring out in the open and make plain what God, who created all of this in the first place, has been doing in secret and behind the scenes all along. Through Christians like yourselves gathered in churches, this extraordinary plan of God is becoming known and talked about even among the angels!
All this is proceeding along the lines planned all along by God and then executed in Christ Jesus. When we trust in him, we're free to say whatever needs to be said, bold to go wherever we need to go. So don't let my present trouble on your behalf get you down. Be proud!

Appreciation of the Mystery (title of section)
My response is to get down on my knees before the Father, this magnificent Father who parcels out all heaven and earth. I ask him to strengthen you by his Spirit--not a brute strength but a glorious inner strength--that Christ will live in you as you open the door and invite him in. And I ask him that with both feet planted firmly on love, you'll be able to take in with all the Christians the extravagant dimensions of Christ's love. Reach out and experience the breadth! Test its strength! Plumb the depths! Rise to the heights! Live full lives, full in the fullness of God.
God can do anything, you know--far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.
Glory to God in the church!
Glory to God in the Messiah, in Jesus!
Glory down all the generations!
Glory through all millennia! Oh, yes!"

To me, reading this entire chapter of Ephesians gives me such an understanding of where Paul is coming from. He's in jail and STILL reaching out to fellow Christians, not only with instructions from God, but with encouragement as well.
As for the 3's---well, there were 3 sections of Chapter 3. All 3 sections had to do with a mystery. Every time I read this, I get something new out of it. I want the mystery revealed to me! I want everything God has to offer, and it's mine for the taking! It's quite frankly all just a spiritual matter. Amazingly, the Bible doesn't have to be complicated. Take Him at His Word...that's what He wants.
Remember that things aren't a coincidence if they continue to show themselves--like the 3's for example. Not that I am putting God in a box and thinking that he can only work with that number. It just seems to be fitting for the place and time I am in right now. Do you have any special numbers, phrases, words, etc? I'd be interested in knowing! :)

Just Believe

I can't count how many times in my life I have heard the statement, "Just Believe." You can find this little 2 word ditty in lots of songs, poems, writings, etc. Have you ever really sat down and tried it though? Without strings attached? I thought I had...
Other statements that rattle around in my brain that deal with this believing are:
"Believe and you shall receive"
"Seeing is believing"
"You've got to have something to believe in"
The one aspect of the Scripture that has had me going crazy with understanding lately is that you CAN believe every single word of what is written. It's not a huge mystery or meant to be a source of frustration. What God says, you can believe with your whole heart, mind, soul, and spirit.

I compare it to jumping off of a 10 story building (which I've never tried--just to let you know). You can:
A) believe that there is some sort of pavement/road/ground below that you are eventually going to hit
B) believe that you will sprout wings and fly instead of fall
I know it sounds very silly, but it's a true analogy. One way or the other, something will happen as a result of jumping. Whether you choose to believe the truth or not, that's the question. Of course, as humans we will not sprout wings and fly off---we are bound to hit the ground below due to gravity and the whole nature of the event. It all comes down to when you are standing up there at the top of the building with your feet hanging half off of the edge, poised to jump. At that moment in time, you have to choose to believe in SOMETHING. Or maybe you realize the severity of it all and you refuse to make the leap. Most would say that is the wise choice here.

I see a parallel of this in my spiritual life---and the choices really aren't that different in the spiritual realm than they are in the physical. What isn't possible in the physical becomes amazingly possibly in the spiritual though. You can become a "spiritual superhero" of sorts. Do you follow me? Once in tune with the Holy Spirit, you can do amazing and superhuman things. Here's an example of what I'm talking about:
I am standing at the top of a "10 story building" of finances with my feet hanging halfway off the edge. I have 2 choices:
A) fall into a life of trying to pay for, rework, settle things, and become debt free by my own doings
B) jump and believe that my Father will catch me before I hit rock bottom and free me from debt by "giving me wings"
Again, some would say that either of the choices are crazy. Some would even pick Choice A. That's speaking on a physical level though. Spiritually, I can rest assured that He promised to catch me. I can stand on His promises from His Word that instill a huge new belief system within my spiritual being. So, in the spiritual world, it is totally possible to jump and be free--gain wings and fly off if you will.
That all being said, to "Just Believe" may sound cliche, but it truly is that simple.
What is it you need to "Just Believe" in today? Would you really trust the Father with those worries, cares, stresses, relationships, etc? Realize that you may be standing at the top of your own 10 story building needing to make a decision. Let it come from the spirit man within, not the human shell on the outside. Close your eyes, and with a smile on your face.......JUMP.
Mark 5:36
"Don't be afraid; just believe."

She's Got Talent

Sorry that it has been several days since my last entry. I had some great one-on-one time with my hubby over the 4th of July weekend (also our 10th anniversary was thrown in there!) so I'm back and ready to attack some areas of the Word that have been on my heart.
What I really wanted to dive in to today is about talents. Amazingly, my small group (worship group) that meets on Sunday nights to fellowship and practice next Sunday's songs talked about this very subject last night. We were breaking down some scripture that dealt with a parable that Jesus told--Matthew 25:14-30. If you are interested in reading that, please do so--even if it's just to jog your memory. Anway, we got pretty deep in a discussion about how and why God gives us the talents He does, or even if there is a rhyme or reason to it. Is it always fair? Equal? Right?
As I was studying and meditating on it all, a thought came to me about Esther. If you don't know her story, there is an entire book dedicated to her name. It's squished right in between Nehemiah and Job in the Old Testament.
Basically, Esther is an orphaned girl that goes to live with her male cousin, Mordechai. The king at that time is looking for a new wife, so his staff basically holds a huge beauty pageant to select a woman for him. Esther was gorgeous, and she made her way to the top of this search very quickly. The king chooses her to be his queen! Later on, she uses the words and power that the Lord gives her to come before her king and ask that her people (the Jews) be saved from a horrible plot to rid the country of them. Mordechai's life is spared, he is promoted to a high position, and the Jews are all saved--just because of the talents and faith of one woman.
Am I speaking of a female power trip here? Certainly not. What I AM speaking of is a wonderful display of how to use the talents we are given. I'll break it down further...
First of all, I consider Esther's beauty to be a talent. It's something God-given and she was able to use it to benefit her and others around her. How else would the king have noticed her and wanted her as his wife? She was confident in the fact that she was blessed with beauty and she wasn't ashamed to use it in the proper way. Second, she used her talent for speaking. It was rare to begin with that she was able to approach the throne of her husband without him summoning her. Back then, that could have been punishable by death. What Esther did was basically ask God to grant her favor with the king. He did so, and she was able to so eloquently speak to him that he paid attention and granted her requests. There are many other talents I believe she possessed--understanding, listening, obeying--and yes I consider those talents. Esther was most definitely blessed and highly favored by the Lord, and therefore she was used by Him to save a very large amount of people from certain death.
The one and most important thing that I take from the story of Esther is this: DO what God asks of you and DO IT when He tells you to! Accept that His provision is with you, His hand is guiding you, and there is nothing to fear! Believe that He wants to use you for great and mighty things--and LIVE like it! More than having an abundance of talents, Esther had a heart for God. That, my friends, is what it's all about!